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Bovi shares his experience with a Port Harcourt prostitue

the Comedian Bovi shares his experience with a Port Harcourt prostitute
Comedian Bovi took his instagram page today to tell a story of how a prostitute in Port Harcourt helped him out when he needed help. Amazing story. Read below
I had just resumed school for second semester 300 level. This was February 2000. My mission was to storm port-harcourt from abraka and surprise my older sister who had just moved to another apartment. All I had was the address to the new apartment. I've always loved to pull surprises and this was my biggest one at the time. I arrived ph in the evening via public transport and traced her new place. Me wey plan to surprise my sister con surprise myself. She had not moved in. Her present address, I didn't have.
Gsm; non-existent at the time, her office? Closed. I was practically stranded in the garden city. After recovering from my rude shock, I took the first 2 foolish decisions. I hailed a cab and told the can to take me to a happening joint. The type that runs all night. He told me it was a Tuesday, the happening joints really don't happen on Tuesday. I insisted there had to be one. Well he jad money to make, so he obliged me. We got there. Dead end. Even the band members and the Dj were off duty. We tried a second spot. No luck. By this time it was past 9pm. So it dawned on me that I should have been looking for a hotel. By the time I checked 2 hotels, I realized that had I not made wayward stops, I'd have been able to pay for a room. Think Bovi, think! I asked again where I could possibly chill till daybreak. A commercial nerve. Someone mentioned "opposite hotel presidential." When I got to hotel presidential; opposite it that is; I was relieved. The groove was real. Outdoor joints, several bar tenders. Pot bellied men with pretty women drinking away their stress. I found my spot, got a seat, weighed my purse and saw that my vex money had been severely eroded. I couldn't even afford a drink. But hey, I could watch. The ladies of the night were present on their droves( soliciting customers). It was a sight to behold. Of they got lucky, they hopped into vehicles of strange men. I enjoyed all I saw until it was midnight and the unexpected happened. All d joints started to lock up. On no time it was just me and the night nurses left on the road side.  Why you no go stay hotel" "why you no go your sister house" "why she Neva pack go her new house?" I had answered all these questions repeatedly. By now I was with the security of the hotel, begging to share their space with them till the earliest signs of daylight. They weren't comfortable with me there. They had even suggested I go to ojuelegba, a spot on the famous Aba road that hosted a retinue of low class sex workers (low in the sense that the better sex workers were the ones who came opposite the hotel) I had turned down the idea politely. Five minutes later, a police patrol can sailed by slowly with "victims" of their raid of ojuelegba. I didn't believe my luck, assuming it was luck. Not long after, one of the busiest girls of the night walked into the security post. I had seen her severally that night. She had to be the busiest of the girls. Leave in a car, return in okada. That happened at least 4 times.she inquired what the problem was. For the 66th time, I narrated. She paused for a while. I had no idea what she was thinking. Then quietly she asked to see the contents of my bag. Two shirts, one trouser, soap can with blue long sponge and body cream. And identity card. Finish! She thought for a while again and then made me an offer. She asked me to follow her to her apartment. I wasn't sure what to do. Security didn't want me there. From their eyes I could tell this was my last offer. She "napkined" on the bike ride to her house.
This was 2am. A small living room and a room with one bed ms living room was as small as the room. It had no furniture. She offered me her bed and slept on the floor. I tries to refuse but she will have none of it.
I was her guest. I don't know if I really slept cos my legs remained on the floor with. my back on d bed. By 5 am I was up. She offered me water to shower but all I did was brush and wash my face. Her brother came in not long after without caring a second who I was, he went straight to sleep. As I made to leave, she untied an end of her wrapper, brought out a wad of notes and offered me 3 fifty naira notes. She bade me farewell.Never to be seen again till this day

Buhari cant remember his phone number

 

President Goodluck Jonathan

President Goodluck Jonathan on Friday during a rally in Enugu said that the All Progressives Congress candidate, Gen. Muhammadu Buhari (retd), cannot remember his own mobile phone number.

Jonathan, whose unscripted address was mostly a response to previous statements made by Buhari, accused the APC presidential candidate of deceiving Nigerians by promising to revive the economy without explaining how he would achieve the feat.

The President wondered how Buhari would develop the country’s economy, a feat he could not achieve while he was in office as head of state between 1983 and 1985.

“Is it now that Buhari cannot even remember his own phone number that he can change the economy of the country.” Jonathan asked.

The Peoples Democratic Party presidential candidate said that although he did not like to “go personal during campaigns,” “sometimes circumstances demand that certain things must be said.”

Jonathan said that Buhari belonged to the medieval age, adding that he (the APC candidate) intended to run the Federal Government as a medieval king.

He said, “We cannot run the government as if we are in the medieval age; we cannot run a government where somebody said he would throw people into jail.

“You are not a medieval king – a medieval king can throw you into jail but we have to follow the rule of law because we cannot go back to the old days.”

Jonathan, however, read the speech made by Gen. Ibrahim Babangida (rtd.) after overthrowing Buhari’s regime through a military coup on August 27, 1985 to justify his claim that the APC candidate does not keep his promises.

Babangida, in the portions of the address read by Jonathan, justified Buhari’s overthrow by pointing out that the latter did not live up to the promises he made to Nigerians when he ousted a democratically elected civilian government headed by Alhaji Shehu Shagari in a military coup.

Noting that Buhari “deceived Nigerians” from 1983 to 1985, Jonathan quoted Babangida as saying, “The initial objectives of Buhari’s intervention were betrayed as there was a general deterioration of standard of living in the country.”

The PDP candidate also pointed out that Babangida accused Buhari of being “too rigid in his attitude to national issues” and “became alienated from the people” in the course of his stay in power.

He, therefore, challenged Buhari to tell Nigerians how he intends to revive the economy.

Jonathan said, “They are telling young Nigerians that they are going to change the economy but they have not told us how they want to manage the economy more than us.

“If they say they want to change agriculture, they should tell us the weak links in the agriculture value chain and what they want to do about it.

“I said in Lagos that I want to work with young people, not to deceive people.

“I am not going to run the government based on my habits, I am going to run the government according to global best practices.”

Jonathan also insisted that he was committed to the campaign against corruption.

“There is no government that has fought corruption more than we do,” he said, noting that some previous administrations pretended to be fighting corruption while oppressing their enemies.

He recalled that Buhari jailed some prominent Igbo politicians while in office as head of state, including former Vice-President Alex Ekwueme and former governor of old Anambra State, Chief Jim Nwobodo.

Stressing that Buhari jailed politicians on trumped up charges, Jonathan said, “You can no longer carry people and put them in prison for 301 years.”

The President equally accused Buhari of having a wrong idea of corruption.

According to him, Buhari believes that every wealthy Nigerian is corrupt.

He said, “If a Nigerian businessman has a private jet, then you are corrupt but if a South African has a private jet then you commend him.

“If you have a good house, then you are corrupt, if you have a good car then you are corrupt – that is his definition of corruption.”

Jonathan accused his opponent of making spurious claims against him.

The President said, “They are saying that government is corrupt but they are not telling us what they are going to do to stop corruption. Let them go back to their consultants to coach them, then I will listen to them.

“They should tell us how they are going to manage the economy better than we do.

“They are saying we stole foreign reserves, nobody can steal foreign reserves – spurious allegations.”

He also reiterated his claim that Buhari did not equip the military while he was the head of state.

Jonathan said that he had done more than his predecessors to shore up the country’s defence.

“For 30 years, we had only one frigate, now we have four additional frigates,” he said.

In the same vein, he pointed out that Buhari did not find any woman worthy enough for appointment when he was the military head of state.

The President asked Nigerians to assess him and Buhari by looking at how they performed during their respective periods in office.

He said, “They have deceived us before and they want to deceive us again.

“Go and find out whether these people are deceiving you or are telling you the truth.

“People are assessing me because I have run this country for some years – they have run this country for two years.

“They came with promises but immediately they came in, what they did was to jail Jim Nwobodo for 201 years.”

Headlines for today from tribune

Presidential Election Fixed On Valentine's Day- INEC Tells Why...

The Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC) on Thursday said it had not fixed the Presidential and National Assembly elections on February 14, to rub Nigerians of the joy derivable from the Lovers’ Day.

The Chief Press Secretary to the commission's Chairman, Mr Kayode Idowu, told newsmen in Abuja that the election date was a coincidence.

''When the commission was taking that decision, it never even occurred to the leaders of the commission that it was Valentine’s Day. But then, it is a day for showing love and if we can show love that will discourage people from fomenting violence.

''That will discourage you from being hateful towards another person on that day. It will make the election peaceful. So, it is a good coincidence''. 

He, however, urged Nigerians to be guided by the meaning of Valentine’s Day to make the election peaceful.

''The message of the day is to show love for one another and therefore, there is no basis for violence, acrimony and being unruly because that day is a day for showing amenable conduct towards others.

''So, that should guide the behaviours of voters as they go out to vote.

Idowu also said that the task force set up by the commission on how to ensure that Internally Displaced Persons (IDPs) in the country were given the opportunity to cast their votes in the forthcoming elections had submitted it report to the commission.

Kayode, however, did not gave details of the recommendations but said the report was now going through the internal processes of the commission.

''Very soon, the specific modality will be announced as to how the IDPs will be able to vote,’’ he said.

#NigerianBulletin

Meet Prof and Mrs Osinbajo APC Vice president.

Are they not lovely?

BBA 9:Tayo Faniran, Gets a Customized Whiskey Bottle

Nigeria’s representative at the recently concluded 2014 Big Brother Africa Hotshots, Tayo Faniran, has received a customized bottle of Whiskey from the James Whiskey Company.

Tayo, who recently denied receiving a gift of $350,000 from a Warri-based billionaire, disclosed the news on Twitter.

He posted photos of the customized bottle and tweeted: “All the Way from @jamesonwhiskey Dublin Distillery Reserve.This bottle has been specially labelled for TAYO FANIRAN .. I’m dedicating this to all the #TeamTayo all over Africa . I love you all”

Nigerian Soldier on Death Row Writes Heartbreaking Facebook Post

One of the 54 soldiers sentenced to death for mutiny, Fahat Fahat, has written on his Facebook wall, and this post has become viral on social networks. 

He wrote: "Hello ladies and gentlemen. I am a soldier and I am sentenced to death by the Nigerian army because we did not go to fight Boko Haram without equipment.
"We asked for weapons, instead they gave us death sentence."

Fifty-four Nigerian soldiers have been sentenced to death by firing squad on Wednesday by a Military Court-Martial sitting in Abuja.

A competent source within the military high command, who confirmed this to newsmen said five other soldiers were discharged and acquitted.

The soldier were accused of mutiny , assault , cowardice and refusing to fight Boko-Haram in the North-Eastern part of the country. (Read more here)

See screenshots of Fahat Fahat's Facebook post

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Important Information on 2015/2016 JAMB UTME Registration

The 2015/2016 JAMB UTME opened in September, 2014 and closes Thursday 15th January 2015. Website for online registration closes Monday 19th January, 2015. Prospective candidates should note the following;

1.The 2015/2016 UTME will be Computer Based Test (CBT) mode only.

2.The Registration Fee is Four thousand, Five Hundred Naira (N4500)

3.The Registration cards can be obtained from the following banks and NIPOST: Zenith Bank Plc, Skye Bank Plc, Union Bank Plc and First Bank

4.At the point of Purchase the following documents shall be made available to the candidates

a) Syllabus for the examination in a softcopy
b) Guidelines on admission (Brochure) in soft copy detailing list of tertiary institutions and available programmes of study (All these are at no extra cost)

5.Candidates are to pay N500 to obtain the newly introduced book “The Last Days at Forcados High School.” However, this will be issued to candidates at the point of registration after showing evidence of payment.

6.Only Computer Based Centres are authorized to register candidates for the 2015/2016 UTME

7.The venue of the examination will be at the candidates chosen town during registration.

8.Candidates are to note that irrespective of their choice of course of study or method of testing, they will also be tested on a general book: “The Last Days at Forcados High School” by A.H. Mohammed.

9.The 2015 JAMB CBT will be conducted on Saturday 28th February to 14th March 2015

10.Candidates who damage or lose their scratch cards before registration will have to purchase another one

11.Multiple registrations are not allowed. Candidates who register more than once will have their entire result cancelled.

12.Candidates are to note that there will be no extension of the date of registration.